I recently realised that I’m now over five years seizure free.
Having controlled epilepsy brings conflicting emotions. The majority of the time it’s great, yet life is never perfect, because life never is. 😄
I used to look at the glistening goal of being seizure free, to me, it was the solution to a my problems but I was wrong.
- My epilepsy hadn’t disappeared. It’s part of me, even if it’s dormant, I’ve accepted that now.
- People still had problems – friends, colleagues, potential partners etc. Would learn that I had epilepsy and regardless of whether it was controlled or not it was an issue for them. I wasn’t expecting that. (If anyone has an issue, they are not worth your time.)
- I felt I had more to lose – I now had a record ‘x’ amount of time and I would be doubly disappointed when it would all come crashing down. I then had a car, what if I lost that? I realised whatever happens will happen, just enjoy the good days.
These are also the reasons why I chose to write my blog.
I can remember sitting at my desk in work holding back tears after a painful experience and I thought how crazy it was. My situation shouldn’t have been a problem, then I wondered about every one else with epilepsy, how must they be feeling every day? More awareness is needed, and support is needed for those hard days.
And here we are,
This year has been great, here’s to the next!